In the film, FBI agents Nelville Flynn (Samuel L. Jackson) and John Saunders (Mark Houghton) escort Sean Jones (Nathan Phillips) to testify in a highly publicized case. In the course of a flight between Hawaii and California, an assassin pays airport security to sneak a time-release crate of over 500 snakes of various sizes on board in the hope of killing the witness.
A scene with Kenan Thompson from Snakes on a Plane
In recognition of the unprecedented Internet buzz for what had been a minor movie in their 2006 line-up, New Line Cinema ordered five days of additional shooting in early March 2006(principal photography had wrapped in September 2005). While re-shoots normally imply problems with a film, the producers opted to add new scenes to the film to take the movie from PG-13 into R-rated territory and bring the movie in line with growing fan expectations. Among the reported additions is a line that originated as an Internet parody of Samuel L. Jackson's traditional movie persona: "That's it! I have had it with these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane!".
Anyway, in response to Schlussel's question, Hairy Fish Nuts imagined this scenario [http://www.hairyfishnuts.com/] :
Terrorist 2: Excellent! Soon the oppressors will know what it's like to die in a really creepy and scary way! Mwahahhahahaha!
Terrorist 3: Say, fellahs... I'm thinking here, sorry didn't mean to interrupt the Mwahahaha... just spit-balling, how about instead of what? 100 lbs of snake? We smuggle on board this bomb I made.... I mean I like the snakes, it's got style, it's going to get us a lot of ink but really we do want to bring the plane down. I know, I know it's old school, it's been done but it's a classic for a reason.
Terrorist 1: No! Snakes on Plane motherfucker! Snakes on plane!!!
Terrorist 2: I didn't spend the whole week looking for poisonous snakes in the poisonous snake district just to use a bomb. You know how many bites I got? You ever try and stuff a dozen cobras into a sack mister? They don't cooperate.
Terrorist 3: Ok! Ok! okay... geez... just an idea... sorry don't get all jihad on my ass."
Of course, the comments in both their blogs are the funniest part:
“I still prefer friggin sharks with friggin laser beams attatched to their friggin heads as my weapon of choice, though.”
“My weapon of choice would have to be pit bulls raised in France [so they would bark in snotty foreign accents, accentuating the terror] with killer bees in their mouths. The genius of my plan would be that once the dogs start biting the passengers their opened mouths would release the bees to sting the aforementioned passengers.”
Wanna know my own personal favorite weapon? Motherf*****g Zombies! Sneak a time-released zombie in one of the toilets. While the plane is in the air, he'll come out and bite the flight attendants, turning them into flesh-eating zombies and unstoppable killing machines.
"Aaargh! Steak or chicken, Sir?"
P.S. Sorry about all the cussing and swearing, but we're talking about frigging Samuel L. Jackson, man!!!
BONUS: Snakes On A Plane Early Auditions
No comments:
Post a Comment